Every Story Has a Beginning and an Ending
Ours began on April 5th, 1969. Our ending came on December 22, 2021. And in between we had the best of times and the worst of times
Put them all together they made a life, a marriage, a pretty good marriage overall.
Bumps and hiccups and worse, not counting the loss of all the family members, friends, and pets, job strife and financial worries over the course of 51 years. And the ectopic pregnancy and miscarriages … unbearable suffering.
Through it all, love endured.
The worst of it all came with Lou’s PTSD.
Ironically, I was an active Vietnam war protestor. I met Lou just after he returned home from Vietnam. He was a hero to his family.
But not to America, even though he was badly wounded and served his country well.
He was suffering physically and emotionally. So was I, after a terrible car accident. We had suffering in common. We understood too young that life wasn’t promised.
So it was that the war protestor and the veteran fell in love.
I couldn’t get into a car without reliving the accident, for years. Lou lived with night terrors most of his life.
Lou’s PTSD took many forms, the worst being frequent rages that exploded in the air like land mines. Arms flailing, he followed me from room to room, angry words that made little sense and weren’t connected to reality.
For years, I struggled to talk him down. But it never worked.
Eventually after a day, he deflated. Then he went to bed for 2 days, unable to utter a word. He had used spent them all.
Still, love endured.
Over time, years actually, I learned to walk away from the battlefield. I realized Lou couldn’t hear me anyway. He had consumed all the oxygen. So I would grab my keys and drive away, leaving him to defeat the conflict alone. So very, very hard for me to do.
Tested and strained, still our love endured.
The battles lessened with time and help. I’d like to thank the therapists at the Coatesville VA for their years of support for Lou…and for me as well!
I know there are lots of stories to be told about the challenges that war veterans face. Feel free to contact me at
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